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★★★★★ "Hilarious and brutally honest. I laughed so hard I snorted." • ★★★★★ "Finally, a dating book that gets it. These red flags are REAL." • ★★★★★ "Read this before you download another dating app!" • ★★★★★ "The audiobook had me crying laughing on my commute." • ★★★★★ "Queer dating chaos at its finest. Essential reading!" • ★★★★★ "Best memoir I've read in years. Couldn't put it down!" •

★★★★★ "Hilarious and brutally honest. I laughed so hard I snorted." • ★★★★★ "Finally, a dating book that gets it. These red flags are REAL." • ★★★★★ "Read this before you download another dating app!" • ★★★★★ "The audiobook had me crying laughing on my commute." • ★★★★★ "Queer dating chaos at its finest. Essential reading!" • ★★★★★ "Best memoir I've read in years. Couldn't put it down!" •

The Worst Boyfriends Ever

"I wanted love to fix me, not find me. That's how you end up in stories like this one."

Twenty-five relationships. Zero closure. One brutally honest memoir that dissects heartbreak with surgical precision and unholy humor.

#1 Amazon Gay Fiction #1 Gay Humor 4.7★ from 120+ readers

Inside:

25 dating disasters — each one a masterclass in what not to ignore

Pattern recognition — disguised as gossip (I was collecting data, unknowingly)

Emotional archaeology — digging through why we stay too long

Humor as survival — because if you don't laugh, you'll scream into the void

"Heartbreak is not a failure—it's a field study."

Choose Your Chaos

All come with questionable life advice and zero emotional warranty.

$7.99

Audiobook

Narrated by Deacon Deane. Full disaster, instant access. (the only red flag you should listen to)

7+ Hours

Bonus Epilogue

All Devices

$19.99

Signed Paperback

Handwritten note. Emotional fingerprints included. Worldwide shipping.

Signed by Author

Handwritten Note

Worldwide Ship

$24.99

Complete Bundle

Both formats. Maximum chaos. Minimal regret.

Save $2.99

Everything Included

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